Friday, August 19, 2011

Date Night

It's Friday! For those working 9-5, it's signals the beginning of the weekend. This Friday is special for Officer and I because he's off and we have a date planned.

*looks at lovey dovey picture* Um, yeah, I hope all the hearts aren't there, lol. A little bowling and food is planned tonight but for parents of 3, the time alone is much needed.

We doubly appreciate our dates because Officer and I don't always have child care for our three girls. My sister is tried and true but she's 25 and likes going out herself. So when Officer's off dates fall on Fri-Sat-Sun, away we go!

All parents need adult time alone. To talk about things other than kids. Maybe discuss work? Silence- Well, we talk about Officer's work, ha! But really, the time is spent just reminding each other of what we were before the children. And sometimes it's foreplay....

                       ----Ten Minutes Later----

*huff huff*

So, it's important to have grown up alone time...


Back to school

School starts back up for Maryland next week. My kids are half excited about it, lol. They'll be going to a new school, again. We moved last year so they had to transfer mid school year. This summer, all the parents in this area received notice that our children's zone school pretty much sucked. The school's 3rd, 4th, and 5th graders didn't test well. Parents had the option to transfer their children to another school that preformed better and I jumped on that opportunity. As I was completing the form, I realized this would be the third elementary school my kids would attend. All because we moved and because we want a better education for   them. How would my children  feel about this?

Unfortunately I jumped from school to school as a child and it wasn't because of reasons mentioned above. I was a foster child. I was placed into foster care after my biological mother's foster mother became too old to care for me and my sister. (You got all of that?) Before foster care, I barely even went to school. No one forced me so I just didn't. I stayed home and helped my foster mother. She raised me from birth and called me her "Eyes." I took my role seriously.

After being ripped out of my biological mother's care giver's arms (seriously), I was placed with another older woman (Baltimore, I tell you) which I can only assume to help with my adjustment. I attended my third school while I was being fostered by this woman for 3 years.

My biological mother had another child during that time and my sister was immediately adopted. Consequentiality, her adopted family lived 10 mins away from my foster home. My sister's family heard about my sister and I, and wanted to take us in. We were moved to stay with them and later adopted. I was 10 and had a new family AND school.

Thankfully my time in foster care wasn't as traumatic as most. I was only with 2 families and remained with my    
sister the whole time. But starting over and over again with new families and new schools takes time. Making new friends, learning your way around all take some kind of adjustment. I wish my daughters' Godspeed on fitting in at their new school. At least their family will remain the same.


Thursday, August 18, 2011

Star crossed lovers... in Baltimore

You see that picture? Imagine me on the right and my man ( from this time forward, Officer) on the left.

It's 2001 and honey, we're in love. Mind you we're also in 12th grade. But we didn't care because we had each other *adds gag sound effects.* I was going through a lot, I mean a whole lot. See my parents put me out. No not with my aunt or other family, out on the street. Officer didn't know at the time but I knew he wondered why he couldn't call me at night (cell phones weren't widely popular then, who would have thought!) and why he never could come over my house. After some time as we got closer, I revealed my family issues to him. Officer didn't run away but made my problems his and helped me out. I lived in his house unbeknown to his mother for a month and then eventually found my own place. Did I forget to mention we were 17? My family hated me and him. Me, just because and him because he was helping me live? I dunno but it wasn't until I became pregnant a year later that Officer's family started hating me too...

Officer and I graduated from high school no problems. He was going away to the Air Force and I was going away to college. ----------- But we didn't. Officer's mother told his recruit he had some kind of medical issue so he wasn't allowed to join. And me being the dumbest, smart person only applied to 1 college just knowing I was going to get in.....

We both licked our wounds and tried to regroup but one month I missed my period...
And Officer and I ignored it because we had our scares before but then...

I was pregnant and Officer's mother HATED me. She thought I was trapping him because of my situation. She thought the baby wasn't his. She thought we were rushing. She thought, she thought! And Officer's naiveness made things worse because he started listening to her. His mother convinced him that he needed to test our baby as soon as it was born so that the baby would be carried for life insurance. He believed it. His family won't even buy clothes or supplies because everyone believed it wasn't Officer's. They didn't say it to his face but made sly remarks to me. And here I was alone depending on him with no family of my own.

After our baby was born, looking just like him I should add, everything quieted down. My family kinda sorta accepted me again and Officer's family kinda sorta accepted me again. Now 10 years later, it's hard to believe all of that happened. We're not lovey dovey close but we're family. And Officer and I are still alive unlike Romeo and Juliet.


Unemployed then 1 interview then 2...

I've been unemployed for 3 months. And it was kinda by choice. I have been a cell phone 3rd party representative for going on 6 years. I was employed with my last company 1 1/2 years, had my now 2 year old, and then went back to work for them 18 months later. Everything was great, the hours agreed with my home life, the money was awesome, and I loved my coworkers which meant something had to give, smh. My company rented space within a warehouse to sell cell phones to their members. This year said warehouse decided they could do our job better and didn't renew the contract. I still had a job with my company but everything was up in the air. No pay information was available, no store locations, nothing. I didn't like all the confusion so I resigned (fancy way to say I QUIT!). And now here we are in mid August and I ain't got no job man...

I couldn't apply for unemployment because my company supplied me with another job so I was stuck. Luckily, I'm not all alone. My fiance' picked up the slack and worked (and continues to work) over time in the most dangerous position besides drug slanging in Baltimore, a police officer. With all the crime and homicides *shudders*, there's an abundance of over time work. He works nights which means when he works overtime, my man doesn't come home until 3 pm and then gets up at 9 pm to work all over again. I hate, hate, hate that :(

Don't think I'm chilling at home eating cereal and watching Maury the whole time though. Well, sometimes I do... I'm careerbuilding, monstering, craiglisting, and every kind of job board searching you can do. But month 1 goes by, and then month 2.... and then August. And every time my man pays double car payment and insurance I feel like nothingness....

August 17, 3 pm:
Call from potential job.

August 18: 5:30 pm:
Call from potential job.

Job 1 is suppose to call to schedule a face to face interview. Job 2 is waiting for me to finish an assessment. I really want job 1 for the pay, perks, benefits, hell for the everything. Job 2 is a guaranteed back up. Beggars can't be choosers.

Now for the waiting game....


*waves meekly* Hey?

Um, I really don't know how to start this. Which is weird because I always have something to say. First I'll start with I'm a 27 (!!!) year old mother of 3 (hooray!). And I've been with my baby father, best friend, provider, and fiance' for 10 years. Before you ask, yes I play Beyonce's "Singles Ladies" to him on the weekends. But really, the date has been set and we're on the course to matrimony next June. So you'll hear about my wedding planning too.

Kids, relationships, wedding planning, Baltimore (yeah I live here), animals *pets my dog MJ*, my Ravens (love football) and yadda yadda yadda. If you found this blog stick around, I'm always a good time ;o)