I know about love...

I remember being told I couldn't comment on love or dating because I've been with Officer for 10 years. True I've been out the dating pool for a minute but that doesn't mean I can't voice my opinions. Granted he's my best friend and the love of my life, but he wasn't my first *ahem* boyfriend.

My boyfriend before Officer was.... different. I met him through my cousin who was dating his brother at the time. My cousin and I thought it would be cute to double date because we hang out all the time and it would be easier lol. Because my parents were in the church (my adopted father was a pastor) we always had the boys meet us at my cousin's house.

I was 16 when we met and he was 19 (hush). For now on I'll call him Locks. He had some long ones with bangs (hush hush). Locks was not cute, at all. As far back as I can remember, I never liked anyone just because they were cute. I like some substance on my men. Anyway, he had nice teeth and an even better smile.

I was a virgin at the time and if Locks wanted to pop my cherry, he never tried. We would kiss heavily, i.e. make out but it never went there. I saw him off and on for awhile and eventually our little fling ended. I'm sure it had something to do with my parents making me stay in the house more and more.

And then the summer of my Junior year, my parents put me out the house. I don't recall the incident or events that sparked my eviction but I was on the street. The only person I knew with his own place was Locks. He moved me in, no questions asked and I couldn't believe my luck....

Until I found out he was addicted to weed. I was still in high school and at the time wasn't working. Even though Locks had his own place, he wasn't working either. See, it was his mother's house. She remarried and chose not to sell the house because of her older children. Locks had the basement to himself and his siblings lived upstairs. Earlier when I said Locks wasn't working, I meant he wasn't working a 9-5 job. He sold weed and smoked up his profits. They say weed gives you the munchies, well... Locks rarely ate. I would be starving because Locks would only buy weed.

Locks had no problem getting jobs though. Just had problems keeping them. He went to Job Corps and had a trade. Job Corps would found his employment but he would smoke weed everyday, fail drug tests and get fired. I was so in love that I was able to look past all that until...

He sleep with another girl while I was sitting on the porch. I was now 17 and Locks and I were intimate. Young love is dumb love but you know what they say about hindsight... I use to hang with Locks and his friends while he sold weed (I didn't realize this until after) because I had nothing better to do. One night while we were hanging on the porch,two girls with short skirts on walked past the house. They weren't all that cute but it was late so Locks' friends started calling at them. I remember one girl was wearing a shower cap (don't ask) so the guys started screaming, Shower Cap!

For whatever reason, the girls stopped and was bribed to perform sexual favors for weed. Shower Cap was resistant but with some nudging from me, she said ok.

The first girl went upstairs with one of Locks' friends. 10 mins later the guy came down and another guy went up. I was in disbelief. I couldn't believe they were running a train on the girl! She finally came down, took her weed and left. Shower Cap went up but came down a couple minutes later. Turns out she was a virgin. The guy she went upstairs with tried but couldn't "fit." The guys were persistant though, and Shower Cap went upstairs with... Locks.

I was done. I just sat on the porch, pretending like I wasn't bothered in the least. What could I do? I was homeless, hanging with drug users and sellers. When Shower Cap and Locks came downstairs, I pretended I was sleep. I must have fell asleep for real because when I woke up, everyone was gone. Word on the street was Locks has been locked up. I was worried. He had been locked up multiple times before and I didn't know if he would have to do jail time. As I trying to sort out my thoughts, Locks' mother rolls up in her car and I saw Locks' sitting in the passenger seat. His mother tells me to get in and immediately asks for my address. I gave it to her because it was easier than explaining why I was on the streets. She dropped me off, I wave goodbye, wait until she got to the corner, and start walking back to Locks' house.

He was all I had at the time...

To Be Continued.

-Toodles

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